From Belsebuub’s live weekly talk – 05/12/2009
I was wondering if you could talk about how lust gets fed in the mind, and through ideas about how to approach dealing with lust?
Sexual attraction is a force like a magnet with two opposite poles. Lust is pretty much everything which is sexual which is not that basic attraction, lust is a distortion of it. Sexual desires are created and multiply when that basic force of attraction gets into the mind (and the mind being not just thoughts, but the whole psychology). Because sexual energy is creative, lust multiplies in many different ways, forming all kinds of variations of sex.
Because lust gets into the mind, then thoughts generate sexual feelings, and sexual feelings bring about further thoughts and images. This is all part of the complexity which is created when the sexual energy goes beyond that basic attraction.
Enlightenment is creation in reverse, to become enlightened the sexual force needs to be cleaned of the multiplicity of sexual desires (egos of lust) and it returns to the pure sexual force of attraction. To become aware of what desires you have, watch the mind, watch anything which is going on which is beyond that basic magnetic attraction, then you’ll see all the different kinds of forms of lust. To change any inner state, you must first see it, become aware of it, and then die to it inwardly.
Alchemy is the only practice anyone can do that can fundamentally alter the sexual make up of the psyche. I once saw a video of some monks who would spend years meditating…I felt sorry for those monks because they don’t have the sexual work to be able to fundamentally change what they are. So they can meditate all they like, they can attain quietness in the mind, complete stillness, but they will not change the actual nature of what they are. And to really awaken in this fullest sense, they need to use the sexual energies with the practice of alchemy.
So observation and alchemy then are fundamental in working on the egos of lust, particularly those in the mind.
I think I remember you mentioning once that when you investigated lust in the inner worlds you found it to be the root of all egos. Does this mean that lust, in a sexual sense, somehow plays a part in everything that we do, think, and feel, or is lust meant in a more general sense as in a driving desire for something—perhaps money, food, or physical objects for example? Or if I dig deeper and observe more closely I’ll eventually find that the desire for food or money somehow has a sexually lustful side to it?
It is that desires of all kinds, the energies of the mind, thoughts, and feelings—all stem from sexual energy. And so every single thought is modified sexual energy, and comes from it. It all stems from sex. I say sex rather than lust, because that’s the nature of psychic energy. Everything is modified sexual energy, which creates, and because of the human mechanism, it forms the basis for thoughts, feelings, emotions, and the whole of one’s psychological life. So to understand yourself you need to understand sex. If you don’t understand sex, you won’t really understand yourself. You can read all the books you like, but you will not understand yourself if you don’t understand sex.
I find one of the biggest obstacles in facing lust is a lack of understanding or perhaps strength. Sometimes a lustful thought or feeling can be present, but without understanding. I feel that my efforts to die to it are in some way superficial because at a more subtle level I am still caught up in it. I’m wondering if any tips could be offered on this?
What does it take to understand the need to work on lust in a spiritual sense? For that, you have to do your best to carry out a spiritual work however you can, using the correct techniques, and then you can gain experience. From that experience, you will get what you need to be able to see things clearly. When you can see clearly what’s going on inside—in relation to sex and the whole of your psychological makeup and the rest of life from out-of-body experiences, in meditation, and so on, getting the whole picture of life—then you understand your place in it. And then, you can understand the purpose of sex.
If you look at this as a purely physical thing, as though nothing esoteric exists, you won’t understand what the purpose of sex is, apart from procreating the species, reproducing. To understand it fully, you need to be carrying out an esoteric, spiritual work, studying yourself, changing, exploring within, and exploring other dimensions and planes of life. Then you can get the motivation to work on it, because you understand the reasons why you should purify and change yourself, and why you should attain spiritual awakening. You need esoteric experience for that.
Sometimes strong sensations in the sexual center appear as if out of nowhere, not seemingly provoked by lustful emotions or thoughts, and that feed mainly fear. These sensations can hang around a long time and the death doesn’t seem to work very well on them. I suspect these are causing havoc in my dreams. Are these just strong egos of lust? Is it just a matter of observing more closely to see their causes or working more with the death so it becomes more effective on them?
Lust goes into many different areas of psychology. It permeates everything; it permeates all thought, all feeling, and it works in the subconscious. So it can arise of its own accord, it can arise when you least expect it. But it has precise triggers—precise things which spark it off.
It can be very subtle and can create images and atmospheres, it can link itself to atmospheres and environments, it can create mental images and forms from even these, and when in that environment in ordinary life, sexual desires (egos of lust) can crop up. And in dreams there can be various environments in which the dreamer finds themselves, where they are caught up in lustful thoughts, images, sensations, actions, and so on. This is because it permeates all avenues of the psyche.
Exploring it is not an easy thing, because it requires precise observation in the three-dimensional everyday world, you also need to maintain that self-observation if you are in the astral plane, and when you wake up from dreams, try to remember them, as you’re likely to see sexual desires in those too. In this way you get to form a picture of lust and how it works. And as you go deeper into it, as you observe more and more, you’ll find all the different layers and all the various places that you go to in dreams. And you’ll uncover so much and see even the representation of the forms of lust, which crystallize and take their own shape and their own life externally from the individual, because sexual energy is creative energy, and the things which are brought out of it and created from it will then latch on to environments in their own dimension, which are felt here in the physical counterpart of that dimension.
So it takes acute observation in the three-dimensional world and a gradual clearing of the various “selves,” states, desires of lust to be able to get into the deeper levels which bring up things from the subconscious which you don’t know existed or you don’t see, and which usually appear with a feeling. The practices of alchemy and inner death help to clear the subconscious of those desires and helps to get into their esoteric side, where you are able to uncover the roots of desires as they are happening and to see their nature, what creates them, what sustains them, and how to get rid of them.
Is it possible for you to share with us more what helped you to realize the degree of harm that lust brings to human lives, how it becomes the very root of selfishness and inner darkness?
Most people think that lust is fine—it brings pleasure and reproduces the species, and therefore, how could it possibly be wrong or harmful? But when you explore deeper, you begin to see its effects, which go right into the psyche. And you will find that sex is both the root of spiritual awakening and personal degeneration. Lustful sexual desire is an enslaving force. It’s has enslaved the whole of humanity; it’s caught everybody by its desire, and it twists and turns, and alters, changes the whole nature of the individual or aspects of the individual. And I didn’t like being a slave to something. I didn’t like having a desire which controlled me. I wanted to be free of it.
And as I studied within myself I began to see how I worked psychologically and how lust worked. I began to study the mechanisms, and I also began to explore out-of-body experiences so that I could see that there was life beyond this world. And as part of this, I wanted to explore what was my greatest enslavement—which was lust.
And I remember in one of the first out-of-body experiences that I had, I came out of my body just on the bed in my bedroom and I looked around and there was this figure which I now know to be Lucifer, you know with the horns—it actually symbolizes something other than the devil; it’s the tempter, the light bearer—and he brought out something within me, sexual desire, and I could do no other than just be lost in that sexual desire. I couldn’t fight it or anything, it felt almost like it tricked me. And then I looked in the mirror which I had in the bedroom, and to my astonishment, I found myself (just in the reflection of the mirror) in a wheelchair, looking really sick and ill. And I knew that from feeding that sexual desire, that was the result upon my consciousness, on my essence.
And so I knew very early on when I began to study myself that sex was a huge force to try to understand and overcome, to break this enslavement. And as I would study more, I would see more and more of the various forms of lust and the various ways that it operated, and I began to look into them and to change. It’s through alchemy that I really had the means to overcome them, and through the various stages along the spiritual path, particularly as the higher spiritual forces came into me. The choice then became clear between the pleasure of lust spiritual bliss. Fortunately, as I persisted along the path, the spiritual bliss eventually became so strong, it overrode the pleasure of lust.
Now, lustful desire brings things to itself, it brings form to itself, to the individual who it lives in, and this binds the individual to the world, to matter, to form. And this lustful energy in itself is also then bound into inferior regions, which is the abyss, through the coccyx bone. And an energy goes down—you can’t see this physically, you see it when out of the body, occasionally you might—this goes down right into the earth. It forms the Kundabuffer, which has been represented in many cultures as the tail upon demons.
And in the earth in different dimensions there are lower regions, and in these lower regions there are the energies within the person’s own psyche. And they go on various levels down until you get at its densest, which is where the root of lust lies. It’s called the Seat of Satan, and the world revolves around it; it’s a point of the densest energy (at that central point is also infinity, and the point from which an individual ascends esoterically). It has its internal counterpart for the individual and for the world. And the energy from the dense abyss goes up and as it goes up it gathers its form, and its energies from the corresponding regions of vileness as it rises up. It goes eventually into the coccyx bone of the individual and then permeates the psyche from there. And that psyche then has the effect of being hypnotized.
So it’s not just that there are desires within the individual, in thoughts, emotions, and so on, which are modified sexual energy in themselves and which feed from the sexual center, but that various states keep being pushed out and fed and sustained from the energy coming from the coccyx bone and all the influence of the abyss that’s being brought with it. And so because of this, the psyche becomes hypnotized and caught in an illusion. And these energies come at a rapid rate, so the different selves, or egos, come in and out of the person rapidly; some are sustained, as they feed off the persons energy.
Now, the thoughts, emotions, and feelings are fed from sexual energy, and when there is not enough, when the energy is used up in too much thinking, physical activity and emotions, it has to come from somewhere, because there’s only a certain amount. That energy is taken from the sexual center. That energy which was taken is not pure, it has sexual energy made lower by sexual desires in it, which then brings increasing sexual thoughts, as lust permeates the thoughts. So when someone thinks, then they soon start to think about sex. That then takes its food from the sexual centre again (draining it in the process) because it’s a sexual thought, and the energy becomes pulled from the intellect to the sexual center. When the sexual centre has its energy taken it gets it back from other centers, such as thoughts, instincts and emotions, that energy comes back in a low mixed up state.
And this process makes a person feel really heavy, low, miserable and dense. And suffering from this, lust becomes all-powerful, because the entire energies of the psyche are permeated with lust. All the energies of thoughts and emotions are all permeated with lust. And lust then is permeated with thoughts and emotions, because they all start stealing from each other, and all get mixed in. And the more they mix in and the more that they are churned around, the heavier, the denser the inner states become; plus you’ve got this force coming from the coccyx and pouring out these heavy forms and energies, and then the whole of the human psyche is polluted, hypnotized and altered.
What you find in practical terms from this is that emotions become compulsive, you can’t stop thinking, or daydreaming, and lust becomes extremely strong and enslaving. And this is the state of humanity. This is how people are in the world, all of your neighbors, your friends, your colleagues, the people on the other side of the world—they’re all like this.
Meditating, being quiet, aware and still, helps to a degree because it does stop or minimize the interchange of energies from one part of the psyche (centre) to another, but it does not change the nature of the energies themselves, which are already polluted and dirty—it just quiets them down.
At night the energies of the centers and the physical body all recuperate and recover, a new day starts with each center reasonably recharged with its energies. If you stay aware and die to egos in the centers then you maintain each center of the psyche with its own energies. These energies are cleaner and carry less sexual desire, the cleanliness of these psychic centers determines how ‘spiritual’ you feel. Being clear psychically consciousness can manifest better in the psyche, undisturbed by lower energies. And in this state, with the help of alchemy, you can carry out a work to awaken, as it’s a surplus of clean energy which is needed as the basic energy to be transmuted to create solar spiritual bodies – to create oneself anew spiritually. If there is no surplus, only low, heavy, miserable energy, there is a lack of material for transformation.
Each day brings its opportunities to spend the energies of the psyche wisely, and to use them for awakening, or to spend them in lower states. The psychic centers (thoughts, emotions, etc) can be kept clear and clean for the whole day, but as soon as they get mixed up, you have to struggle to become aware. So you prevent them from getting mixed up by being as aware as you can through the day from the time that you get up, while you still have energies.
But that in itself doesn’t change the nature of the energies themselves, because they are still at a certain standard or level, and still the energy from the coccyx bone is coming up, so it becomes a very difficult fight, and this is where alchemy comes in. Alchemy changes the nature of the energies and stops the energy from rising to the coccyx bone by facilitating the awakening of the Kundalini.
So the psyche, in its ordinary state is hypnotized, it is submerged in the subconscious and is therefore in darkness, because all these lower states and the hypnotic effects, don’t allow a person to be aware, to see reality, to be here. The consciousness, which is the root of what a person really is, is then in darkness. And the darkness is all the different states, is all the modified energy. Every single feeling, thought, emotion—this is the darkness. And the darkness is connected to the bigger darkness, from the energy in a different dimension that goes from the brain, through the spine down into to the coccyx bone and into the interior of the earth, which is the abyss, and the human being like this is bound by lust and sex, and doesn’t have the means to do anything about it without inner death and alchemy. This is the issue, the human being is enslaved without alchemy, and lives in darkness, they can’t see, because the psyche is hypnotized. In itself it is that darkness.
Each ego traps a fragment of consciousness, 97%is trapped in this way, as you get rid of each ego the tiny part of consciousness in it is freed and joins the already free 3%, which is what is used to be self-aware. So you’re extracting the consciousness which is in the subconscious, and then it’s pure, it goes back to the whole consciousness. And you keep doing that with every desire that emerges, so you bring back consciousness which was merged with darkness. And as you do it, that fragment of consciousness, has the knowledge of the darkness that contained it.
And this is how you get self-knowledge. It’s not by thinking about something; you get knowledge and wisdom because you are extracting consciousness, light, from darkness, and setting yourself free. Many people would like to be slaves of lust, but being a slave is not an intelligent way to live. It’s far better to be free, and being free, a person can be happy and peaceful.
